I was going through my pictures recently to see what characteristics I could capture from a first grade picture. Since quite frequently I’m helping people access memories from their early toddler years, I thought it might be appropriate to see what I might discover about myself at that age.

So I found this picture of myself.  I think it depicts a few characteristics that might be important to talk about. Sometimes we appear one way on the outside, but inside we’re not feeling the same. We may have learned to keep a good face and cover up some of our hurtful child feelings because there was no one to go to comfort us.

In this picture of myself I appear to be quite peaceful and happy, but I would say that inside probably didn’t reflect those feelings.  I felt somewhat alone in my family with older siblings that were busy accomplishing things in high school.  I always felt the competition to keep up with them even though I was quite a bit younger.  In school the teachers remembered how smart my brother and sister were so I was compared to them quite frequently… and I fell short of their performance.

So early on, I learned to keep performing which kept me in a perpetual state of striving never feeling like I had done enough.  What patterns did you learn in your upbringing that are showing up negatively in your life today?  Do you take time to examine them so you can allow yourself to let go of what’s not serving you well?  I am blessed to have turned to my faith for healing.  God never views us through a lens of comparison.  He sees us all uniquely created by him with beauty and inherent value. WE are the ones that have a hard time accepting that.

This illustrates what I have learned from my painting class. There are not any two paintings that look alike. Even though we are all using the same drawings, I see how each palette of color and style comes across different in each of the students paintings.

• Take time to examine what your unique patterns are that are negatively impacting you from your childhood
• Give up the comparison trap. You will never come out entirely even.
• Begin accepting your own uniqueness
• Allow your palette of colors to shine brightly

Here’s to owning your own uniqueness!

Suzanne Simpson